I honestly feel like some parents are the most selfish people on earth. So you decide to have unprotected sex one night and then “BOOM!” The baby’s here. Here’s the thing though, realise that I said you, the parents, decided on this. Choosing not to do anything about the fact that your partner has no condom on because you’re too “caught up in the moment” is a choice too. Here’s the thing though, the baby had no say in this whole thing. This might sound stupid because the baby wasn’t there when you conceived it but always remember this.
So you’re in an argument with your child when you decide that it’s okay to bring up the fact that you have given them the best life possible, that you work hard for them and that’s why you’re barely ever home. You bring up the fact that some children out there are starving and orphaned, that some children’s parents are barely getting by. Here’s the thing though, the child didn’t ask to be here. So what you’re saying basically, is this :
I made you for my own [selfish] reasons but it’s okay because I’ll provide for you, monetarily and sometimes emotionally. You need to understand though, some children have no parents and some children’s parents have no money but they are always home [they’re there emotionally too] but that’s a bad thing because I am giving you the best life possible by giving you money and not knowing what’s going on in your life or even what you do with the money that I give you.
Here’s one thing parents fail to understand though: YOU made us. Why then do you think that you’re doing us a favour by carrying out your responsibility as our parents. You are NOT, in any way, being selfless by waking up every morning and going to work to ensure that I have a good life. You are simply doing what you signed up for by deciding to have us. Selflessness is a mother who is co-parenting with a man who raped her, not you who enjoyed every moment of the fun.
So everyday, remember this – parenthood is a choice you made so never make your children feel like they are a burden because they didn’t ask to be here.
Written by Inga Ncetani, Grade 10 student, 16yrs